Linda N. Edelstein, Ph.D.

Romantic Adult Attachment Styles

by | Aug 12, 2011 | Life Ain't For Sissies, Marriage, Personal Growth, Relationships

Researchers describe 4 different types of romantic adult attachment styles. I’m not totally sold on the concept but, it is interesting to read and think about your romantic relationships.

  1. Secure – You have a positive sense of yourself and your partner. You find it easy to become close. You are comfortable depending on others and having them depend on you. You don’t worry about being alone or being accepted.
  2. Preoccupied – You have a negative sense of yourself and a positive sense of others. You want to be very close to others but are not sure that sentiment is returned. You are uncomfortable without a close relationship. You worry that you value others more than they value you.
  3. Fearful – You have a negative view of yourself and others. You are uncomfortable getting close to others. You find it difficult to trust others or to completely depend on them. You worry about being hurt if you allow yourself to be close.
  4. Dismissing – You have a positive sense of self and a negative view of others. You are comfortable without close relationships. It is very important for you to feel independent and self-sufficient. You prefer not to depend on others and do not want them to depend on you.

 Source: Bartholomew and Horowitz 1991.

If you are an early career therapist, you will find “What Do I Say? to be an essential, comforting, informative addition to your professional library.  You can order it at http://www.amazon.com

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